angryintellectual:

alphabeticool:

“They’re my……… HEAD LIGHTS. GET IT?????”

“No.” 

jpgbert:

one time in seventh grade during orchestra class we were trying to come up with nicknames for everyone and there was a kid named dylan so we were like ‘how about dildo hahaaa that sounds funny’ but see none of us knew what a dildo was and apparently neither did my teacher because he went to go look it up on the computer and when he came back we all got real quiet and he stared at us for like 5 minutes and then finally he said ‘do not call him dildo.’ and that was the highlight of my middle school experience 

listinthings:

• be unaware of where the penis is
• scream into the penis
• use the back of your hand
• slap the penis and call it “buddy”
• condescend to the penis
• set your hand on fire

tenaflyviper:

b0nerman:

“Hey dipper you smellin’ fine”

“stop Minotaur das gay”

“do i smell emotional issues?”

ethicalnonchalance:

the Mistress beams as she strokes a finger over the monitor of her screen

her poorly drawn art of the Warden and his future self lights the computer screen as she silently whispers

“i ship it”

sandsibilings:

so I looked up sex offenders in detroit and I learned that apparently they cannot cross running water